Saturday, December 29, 2012

Haiku Monday: Sea Change

Unfettered tresses;
locks tossed like twigs onto flames
ignite; hear them roar.

Monday, December 17, 2012

Haiku Monday: Resolution

Somnolent seedling
labors through April's chilled berth;
courted by the sun.

Sunday, December 9, 2012

Haiku Monday: Class

Silken angel braid
soaked in inkwell's oily pool.
The payback's a bitch.

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Haiku Monday Results / Pretend

Message from the czar:

I am going to assuage my ego and pretend that the reason Fleur roped me into this exercise was to make up for her absence in a Czar-hosted HM week with a theme that my dear friend would have hit out of the park, not that that was the intent, and I only realized it later. Then again, most weeks, everyone hits it out of the park these days.

[Just as background for those of who you don’t know and who might care, Fleur and I worked together at an insurance association, of all things, back in the mid-1980s. Fleur was a coworker of the future czarina, and was a bridesmaid at our wedding. As we now understand, we were virtual children then. We’ve for almost thirty years been part of a small group -- not unlike HMers -- who pride ourselves on what legends we are, in our own minds or otherwise. Although we probably were out of contact for 10 or more years, HM has brought Fleur and me back to our old tricks.]

I know the real reason: Without a cast of thousands, the idea of Fleur bringing in an HM winning essay on her own before people are embarking upon their weekend plans is about as likely as her stepping onto New York’s mean streets in an army jacket and a pair of faded corduroys. I think one of Fleur’s past excuses had to do with her sister and mother going to follow a fleet of Canadian sailors somewhere. Not exactly sure.

Not that Fleur’s Gaffney peach watertower haiku would have beat Her Serendipitousness’s sunset reflection that week. I can only imagine what Blowfish’s reaction to the peach must be. Especially with what South Carolina is in the czarist mind (no offense to our reader[s] from South Carolina), the idea that the state has erected what appears to be a colossal monument to a woman’s derriere right on the interstate is a matter of some confusion.

Wait. Why am I writing? What’s the theme? Refuse? Repent? Resist? Oh, Pretend. Who am I? Why am I here? Maybe I’ll resist the temptation to toss off bon mots to keep myself amused. Maybe I’ll resist talking about haikus altogether? No, wait. Pretend, pretend.

Maybe I’ll pretend I’ll make the final wording easy for Fleur, after all the onerous rules I established up front. She was only about a quarter kidding. Her word is as good as her word. And her words have always been pretty good, as you know.

Protocol: I suggested to Fleur that we submit to each other our top three with reasons, ranked, and I’d take a first pass and compiling and writing up the results; then she’d edit and have final say-so.

Simple, right?

Well, rather than three, I offered seven: 2 first place, 2 second places, a third place, and 2 honorable mentions.

Fleur offered four, I think. Are they ranked? Dunno? Were there names attached to two of them? No. I’m thinking that, knowing Fleur, this was some attempt at electoral sabotage that some of the children once attempted on the back of the Partridge Family bus.

Let’s pretend this was going to be simple.

As far as I can tell, here are the ones that drew specific comments. I’ll work up from what’s roughly honorable mention to what may have been a clear winner. Sorta. In our pretend universe.

Nice thing is, everyone got a call.

We each liked a different one of Serendipity’s; comments on the logs: “Another childhood pretend interrupted by reality. The concept of a maiden voyage by, well, a maiden is most clever.”

Chickory’s first on a deceptive-looking day received double kudos. The subsequent explanation was very interesting, too.

Fishy, 1st Trojan Horse: “epic story, best fakeout in history (until the Crying Game).

Moi’s was noted for great phrasing, sounds, complex use of theme and a good visual. If we were pretending this was a fair fight and voted on tangibles, Moi might have come away with the win this week.

Island Rider’s was a great twist: the terrible two who’s figured it out and the supposedly grown-up family who wants to cling, and for what?

Becca’s on (the) burned dinner (metaphor), like another one haiku soon to be discussed, attracted one of the judges particularly because both parties in view will ultimately be pretending here. The speaker of “yes, dear” -- a phrase often loaded with pretend if there ever was one -- is uncertain. Too, once getting past that phrase, just about every word carries a double meaning that makes the short, simple syllables ricochet all over the place with multiple associations. Even “honey” sets off Lenny Bruce connotations that help the verse along -- a man who wrote a fictional (pretend) autobiography.

 But, alas:

Spring tryst; oh Oh OH!
Oh Honey! You are the best!
Work on shopping list.

Karl’s ode to the fake orgasm received superlatives from us both: “hilarious, the biggest ongoing fakeout in human history.” “Works for all involved. Take the same first two lines and close with five syllables about thinking of someone else, and you have  a daisy chain of pretend, and a might empty one.”

Without pretense, the week goes to Sir Karl. The rest of us . . . worthwhile pretenders.

From the Fleur:
Well said, Csar!  I am in awe of Karl, all my fellow HM entrants, and you for having worked both the Partridge Family and Lenny Bruce's lady into the same winner write-up!

Sunday, December 2, 2012

Haiku Monday: Pretend (AKA 50 Shades of Csar)

HAIKU MONDAY: December 3, 2012        


Haiku Monday Posse, things are going to be a little different this week.


We now pause for my tardy haiku on the Csar's theme SOUTHEAST:

The road to Gaffney.
Stuckey's pecan treasures shrink
before the Big Peach.


Because I missed the deadline for submitting that entry to Csar, I have offered him the final judging role on this week's theme: PRETEND.     

I will be pre-judging.  Although the Csar agreed to participate, the guy put forth more conditions than Barb Streisand contracting for Donna Karan's Hamptons' holiday party: you must do this; I insist on that; I am veto-ing that theme; this is your sub-deadline, then this is your pre-draft-deadline, and your final deadline is that.  Oh, and make sure that you do this particular thing without fail.

 O. M. G.

But take a step back and realize that you are working with a genius, and a giant.  You realize that taking hard licks from the Csar will help you create the kind of Haiku Monday that ranks right on up there with one of the masterworks of all time, YENTL.


  • Leave your entries in my comments

  • 5 syllable, 7 syllable, 5 syllable format.
  • Kigo (seasonal reference) and Kireji (cutting word) are considered though not deal-breakers
  • Visuals will be taken into consideration
  • Submit up to two for judging, and others if you like for pleasure, but label them accordingly.

DEADLINE:  Midnight tonight (Monday), Pacific Time

Good luck to all!  

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Haiku Monday: Resist

His narcotic scent:
orange groves on a Turkish sea.
Married now! Defriend?

Monday, November 19, 2012

Haiku Monday: Rock Edifice

Words to build dreams on;
as solid as winter's ice
before truth melts it.

Monday, November 5, 2012

Haiku Monday: New Yorker Cover

Winter's jealous heart.
Lissome limbs of spring blossom;
a late frost sparkles.

Monday, October 29, 2012

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Haiku Monday Winner: Chalk

Very sorry for the delay, my Haiku Monday friends.  Technology issues; but the $22 counterfeit Mac charger that my brother ordered for me before he headed to Tijuana for his gastric bypass surgery finally came.

I do still love HM, and I absolutely adored each and every entry this week!  Very thoughtful and varying takes on the theme.   Thank you all so much for playing.  I've said it before: it is fun to host, but very hard to judge.  I did make comments on my previous blog; so in the interest of shortening the suspense:

I am giving two awards today:

Best image: for "superman flies free" to Corey Jo.  Adorable.

Haiku Monday Winner:

a poof of chalk cloud
rises up from the line; Ha!
double fault, game match


This was a tight story and perfect chalk dust sensory overload: like when the nuns used to have you clean the blackboards and then you'd clap the erasers together. I could taste the chalky cloud.

Congrats, Chicky!    And everyone!

Friday, October 19, 2012

Haiku Monday: Chalk

Welcome to Haiku Monday; where, like the last rose of summer, we appear bedraggled and at the end of our days--but it's just because we are resting for the renaissance on the horizon!

This week's theme is "Chalk".

The Haiku Components:
  •                                                       Three lines:
Five syllables
Seven syllables
Five syllables
  • kigo  - the season word, referring to seasons of the year.

  • kiregi -  the *cut* word, which refers to the abrupt change between the two meanings or points of view of the poem.
  • An image (not a component of regular haiku, but apt images will count towards winner points.)
Please submit two for judging in the comments, and if you have an image, please link to it.  Deadline is midnight, Pacific Time on Monday, October 22.
Good luck!  I look forward to reading your treasures.


Monday, October 1, 2012

Haiku Monday: Obsession

Your words, in amber;
forever true, always mine.
My words, just the wind.

Monday, September 24, 2012

Monday, September 17, 2012

Haiku Monday: Chameleon

Sticky rocket tongue
launched from clownish camouflage;
the Kiss of lizards.

Saturday, September 8, 2012

Haiku Monday: Happy Hour

Happy Hour?

 After work cocktails.
My secret crush downs red wine;
leaves with the waitress.

Sunday, August 26, 2012

Haiku Monday: Unexpected

 Some moonlight moonshine.
Kissing cousins' truth or dare.
A shotgun wedding.

Oscar telecast.
Favorite wins; no speech prepared?
Please! I call bullshit.

Sunday, August 19, 2012

Haiku Monday: Up

Sweet and doomed twins climb
nursery rhyme's grassy knoll.
Pail of water spills.

Monday, August 13, 2012

Haiku Monday: Solitary Retreat

Silk, warm on her wrist.

His touch on her sleeve, like flames

at the palace gates.

Sunday, August 5, 2012

Sunday, January 29, 2012

Haiku Monday: Rain

Silver sparkle drops
cascade like dewy diamonds.
Gutter's wet treasure.

Saturday, January 21, 2012

Haiku Monday: Beauty

The fountain of youth:
fed by tears that blur my face
in the looking glass.

Last rose of Summer
longs to be plucked with delight
like Spring's first blossom.

Monday, January 16, 2012

Haiku Monday: Treasure

               9th grade valentine
               saved like the Shroud of Turin.
               I forget his name.